I think you’d enjoy Svetlana Boym’s writing on nostalgia if you haven’t already come across it! She’d describe that sense of acceptance you felt after Comic Con as ‘reflective’ nostalgia. Then there’s the ‘restorative’ type, which longs to recreate the past via the fondness you might feel replaying a memory, or the expectation of filling a hole by buying that cheap souvenir, or voting for a person you think could take you back to ‘how things used to be’, etc.
This one resonated a lot with me in some darker ways. I've recently been reconnecting with some family members I haven't had the chance to talk to in a long time and the way we connect is talking about past media we've enjoyed, and how artificial it feels now.
Really loved this one! I think nostalgia is being commercialized because there is not enough money being invested in new ideas. To be honest most executives are lazy and just want to make money on something they know will work. Even if it is a reboot of a TV show they know will only have a blimp of popularity online.
I'm curious though - what happened with the girl that kissed you? Did y'all ever talk about it? Like that is such a random thing for her to do lmfao. She's bold though. Im 25 and still couldn't do that to someone.
I posted this recently and your newsletter reminded me of it:
Brené Brown recently shared a post on Nostalgia which tapped into something I have really been thinking about deeply in my free time.
Why Nostalgia? As a fundraiser, and psychologist by training, it’s always been my perception that a lot of what I do is help people unpack their own transformational experiences. So as to provide themselves the resources, self awareness, and motivation to altruistically recreate those experiences. In turn creating a sort of intergenerational resonance for future generations.
If you had a transformational experience, like studying abroad, and you have funds to allow someone else to have a similar experience, I would argue that you are now projecting your own experience, and dare I say shared memory, into the present and future. Think about your parent or grand parent, are their things you do because they shared their passion and love with you? Golf, skiing, baking those famous cookies or that pimento cheese recipe passed on for generations; same idea.
Most who know me know that I use this analogy. College, for many, is a time of great intellectual and social developmental growth. In which we grow with our alma maters as we matriculate. However, when we leave these institutions we sometimes fail to realize that neither we, ourselves, nor our schools stop growing. The hope is that as we get older and reflect on the experiences we value that we can find a way to grow together again.
Nostalgia I would argue, becomes the glue, by which we reconnect, explore and assess the value of our most impactful experiences. Trauma, however, from a neurological perspective, works similarly but it is nostalgia’s somewhat superpowered alter ego.
When we experience nostalgia we allow our brain to trace neural connections and explore these connections through both contextual and sensory serial and parallel processes. Nostalgia allows us to better view the collage of our lived experiences. Trauma on the other hand shorts these connections allowing our amygdala to fuse or hardwire fast lanes between sensory fragments rapidly eliciting a pain avoidance response. Like lightning it follows the path of least resistance to process and necessitate a response, this fast tracking is the basis for fight or flight. You don’t need to think of grandmas cookies before quickly taking your hand off a hot stove.
Pain, as Brown notes, is something we will take extraordinary steps to avoid. When these steps become maladaptive they often become the basis for mental disorders, like PTSD. However, in the therapeutic setting we can use nostalgia to safely explore and desensitize pain evoking stimuli that trigger trauma avoidant responses.
I use a lot of motivational interviewing techniques in my work to help folks explore and reflect on their values and what they find meaningful. That said I wanted to share sometime else I am reading. Hopefully it will spark some thoughts for you to explore.
Also, you should see the research coming out on how Millenials and Gen Z’s are abandoning or isolating from Boomer and Gen X parents. It’s really interesting.
small group of online freaks unite!
I actually laughed out loud at that line...too accurate
Oh this hurt a little more than I expected
I'm still in my 20's and this shit hit hard.
I think you’d enjoy Svetlana Boym’s writing on nostalgia if you haven’t already come across it! She’d describe that sense of acceptance you felt after Comic Con as ‘reflective’ nostalgia. Then there’s the ‘restorative’ type, which longs to recreate the past via the fondness you might feel replaying a memory, or the expectation of filling a hole by buying that cheap souvenir, or voting for a person you think could take you back to ‘how things used to be’, etc.
This one resonated a lot with me in some darker ways. I've recently been reconnecting with some family members I haven't had the chance to talk to in a long time and the way we connect is talking about past media we've enjoyed, and how artificial it feels now.
I loved it! You always have a way of putting into words the thoughts in my head that I can’t form myself
This freak is laughing and crying. You’re spot on, Lolo, and I think I hate that.
This is a beautiful essay. Thank you
Really loved this one! I think nostalgia is being commercialized because there is not enough money being invested in new ideas. To be honest most executives are lazy and just want to make money on something they know will work. Even if it is a reboot of a TV show they know will only have a blimp of popularity online.
I'm curious though - what happened with the girl that kissed you? Did y'all ever talk about it? Like that is such a random thing for her to do lmfao. She's bold though. Im 25 and still couldn't do that to someone.
Life hasn't lived up to the boundless wonder I thought it held…. Oof, I felt that.
Christina is a fucking icon. Beautiful work, as always! 💛
I posted this recently and your newsletter reminded me of it:
Brené Brown recently shared a post on Nostalgia which tapped into something I have really been thinking about deeply in my free time.
Why Nostalgia? As a fundraiser, and psychologist by training, it’s always been my perception that a lot of what I do is help people unpack their own transformational experiences. So as to provide themselves the resources, self awareness, and motivation to altruistically recreate those experiences. In turn creating a sort of intergenerational resonance for future generations.
If you had a transformational experience, like studying abroad, and you have funds to allow someone else to have a similar experience, I would argue that you are now projecting your own experience, and dare I say shared memory, into the present and future. Think about your parent or grand parent, are their things you do because they shared their passion and love with you? Golf, skiing, baking those famous cookies or that pimento cheese recipe passed on for generations; same idea.
Most who know me know that I use this analogy. College, for many, is a time of great intellectual and social developmental growth. In which we grow with our alma maters as we matriculate. However, when we leave these institutions we sometimes fail to realize that neither we, ourselves, nor our schools stop growing. The hope is that as we get older and reflect on the experiences we value that we can find a way to grow together again.
Nostalgia I would argue, becomes the glue, by which we reconnect, explore and assess the value of our most impactful experiences. Trauma, however, from a neurological perspective, works similarly but it is nostalgia’s somewhat superpowered alter ego.
When we experience nostalgia we allow our brain to trace neural connections and explore these connections through both contextual and sensory serial and parallel processes. Nostalgia allows us to better view the collage of our lived experiences. Trauma on the other hand shorts these connections allowing our amygdala to fuse or hardwire fast lanes between sensory fragments rapidly eliciting a pain avoidance response. Like lightning it follows the path of least resistance to process and necessitate a response, this fast tracking is the basis for fight or flight. You don’t need to think of grandmas cookies before quickly taking your hand off a hot stove.
Pain, as Brown notes, is something we will take extraordinary steps to avoid. When these steps become maladaptive they often become the basis for mental disorders, like PTSD. However, in the therapeutic setting we can use nostalgia to safely explore and desensitize pain evoking stimuli that trigger trauma avoidant responses.
I use a lot of motivational interviewing techniques in my work to help folks explore and reflect on their values and what they find meaningful. That said I wanted to share sometime else I am reading. Hopefully it will spark some thoughts for you to explore.
Link to Journal - Trauma and Nostalgia https://library.oapen.org/viewer/web/viewer.html?file=/bitstream/handle/20.500.12657/87675/9789048559237.pdf?sequence=1&isAllowed=y
Also, you should see the research coming out on how Millenials and Gen Z’s are abandoning or isolating from Boomer and Gen X parents. It’s really interesting.
Are you seriously not going to tell us what happened with Christina? Like i give af about Coldplay
damn.